Divorce does not erase the bond between grandparents and grandchildren. Even so, grandparents may no longer be able to see their grandchildren as freely as they did before. Their ability to remain involved often depends on the parent the child lives with and on whether contact between the child and the other parent continues.
There are no nationwide statistics specifically showing how often grandparents remain in contact with their grandchildren after divorce. A national survey found, however, that ongoing contact with the parent living apart took place in roughly three in ten single-mother households and about half of single-father households. These figures do not tell us how often grandparents see their grandchildren, but they provide some background for understanding how easily contact with relatives can be affected after a divorce.
Grandparents who want to preserve the relationship generally need to begin by speaking with the child’s parents and finding a form of contact that does not disrupt the child’s daily life. With the parents’ agreement, they might join visits between the child and the parent living apart, speak by phone or video call, or send letters and gifts for birthdays and other occasions. Staying connected does not always require meeting in person.
Under the current system, when the parents cannot agree about contact between a child and relatives such as grandparents, either parent may generally ask the family court to arrange mediation or make a decision. Grandparents themselves can apply only in limited circumstances, such as when one parent has died or cannot be located and there is no other suitable way to address the matter.
The court does not look only at how strongly the grandparents wish to see the child. It considers the child’s age, personality, daily routine, wishes, and the burden that contact may place on them. The central question is whether the arrangement is genuinely necessary for the child’s well-being.
This can be difficult for grandparents to accept. After divorce, however, the child’s stability and sense of security take priority over the wishes of the adults involved.
A practical way to preserve the relationship is to respect the parents’ arrangements, avoid drawing the child into adult conflict, and maintain whatever form of contact can continue without placing pressure on the child.